A couple of days ago I was in Cornmarket Street, the heart of Oxford City Centre. Although many students had already left for Christmas, the place was full of people, like on any other off day.
My attention was drawn to an open air mission conducted in the middle of the street (the place is out of bounds for vehicles). A young tall man was making a loud speech. Part of what he was saying was, “I can see most of you carrying loads of goods and gifts bought for Christmas. However, as I stand here and watch, I see that hardly any of you has a happy face. It is often the case that those with the heaviest bag of shopping look least happy. Why has happiness disappeared from our lives, despite all the riches?”
He added, “Our situation is like that of a child who has been offered many gifts. He is so engrossed with what he got that he would not listen to his parents telling him to dispose of the wrappings properly. Whatever we have today is given to us by God, but we turn our backs on Him”.
I thought these were quite thought-provoking and well-articulated words. I had longed to listen to more of it but I couldn’t do so. It wasn’t because I was rushed, or anything like that. I simply didn’t want to look like a fool by not doing what the rest were doing. People of all ages and sex and class were moving to and fro, but unfortunately not a single soul paused to even look at the speaker, let alone listen to his God-talk. The poor man was apparently trying to brainwash his reluctant audience, but his mission itself was being washed away by total apathy.
He would have a much better day if he had selected some other hot topics, such as sex or pornography or the latest luxury products in town. Despite being treated like an alien from another planet, he had the extraordinary spirit to continue to deliver his messages. Perhaps he thought at least God must be listening to him.
If Karl Marx was observing this scene, he would have been extremely happy and extremely sad at the same time. He would be delighted to see that his polemics against religion had a real impact upon the masses. He would be terrified, though, to see his theory on the utopia of communism crushed by full-fledged capitalism. He would be angry to see that communism had been “put into the cold storage” (in the words of a British anthropologist) even in China.
One can clearly see that Christmas (like other major festivals in capitalist societies) has been hijacked by consumerism. It has been increasingly delinked from religion. Capitalism has attempted to change almost everything, including people’s beliefs, values and moralities into commodities. People themselves have been reduced to ‘machines’ to drive capitalist systems. The governments in the western world encourage people to work hard and make money and spend it too. For instance, British government has officially encouraged people in Britain to do more shopping (although they increasingly fear losing money and income sources) as a way of defeating financial meltdown.
As if everybody in Britain was religious, some Brits are set to launch atheist campaigns. One of them planned to start shortly in London will have the following message painted on public buses - “There is probably no God. Now stop worrying and enjoy your life”. There have been several media debates for and against the planned campaign.
The missionary man in Oxford and the atheist campaigners in London are both wrong in the sense that they are using faith as materials for public display or advertisements. They want to promote or demote God, as if the notion of God is a product of a multi-national company. We should not be surprised if a small child from a totally atheist family in London or Oxford asked, “Mummy, can I have a bar of fresh and juicy God please!”
Capitalism’s influence on people is so great that they fail to see what faith actually means. When somebody has a faith in God, he does so without seeking any clarification. Faith can be explained in terms of our everyday mundane activities as well. For instance, if I have to travel by bus or train or plane, I simply buy the ticket and get into it. In doing so, I am expressing my unquestioned faith on the driver or pilot. He might be the worst one and may ultimately cause an accident that could cost my life. Despite all these possibilities, I do not approach the driver or pilot beforehand and ask for his licence, experience and career history. What is this, if not faith?
In the similar manner, if somebody believes in God, he does not question the existence of God. He does not care if God really exists or not. But people often fail to see this simple logic.
The world is poised to celebrate this year’s Christmas. Many will do so without remembering Jesus. Nobody knows if this really hurts or benefits God. But one thing is certain; the fat cats in the capitalist societies of Europe, America, Asia, Africa and elsewhere will once again reap the benefits of Christmas.
Merry Christmas!
Thursday 18 December 2008
Thursday 13 November 2008
Updates
Last weekend was an interesting adventure with a British MP (Conservative Party).
I was invited to a fund raising dinner for the party, in which I was able to meet some senior people including Lord Lawnside (descendant of one of the Prime Ministers and Vice-Roy to India), a senior person in the upper house. The dinner was actually in his massive property hosting a country club and a spa.
Driving around Wiltshire with the MP to attend various Sunday Rememberance events was another fun. Although the day was dark, dreary, cold and raining, the spirits of the people in various small and big towns were high. They had gathered in the churches and streets to remember those heros from their area who lost their lives fighting for the country in various strife and war in the past.
It was a solemn occassion for me as well because many Gurkhas have lost their lives fighting for the British government. Now slowly, they are granted better treatment, but many of those who survived the horrors of war were sent back to Nepal empty handed. The British public now recognised that this was a gross mistreatment of the heroes who fought with their blood and sweat for the British empire.
The events also included offering of wreath to the idols marked with the names of people who lost their lives. Sessions were held in the local churches as well. If you didn't mind the biblical jargons and "amens", churches acted really as a community centre for all, religious and atheists alike. The events also include parade by the scouts and security units in the area. The whole town was shut down during the parade.
I was happy that people were glad to receive me. I always have the impression that people from rural areas are more friendly and open that those from the mega-cities. However, everybody asked me if I was a Gurkha. Perhaps I discovered a stereotype against Nepalese people hidden among the British public. However, I didn't mind because they didn't mean to demean me or whatever. All of them expressed their profound respect for and solidarity with the brave Gurkhas. It was indeed a great thing to learn.
It was interesting to learn that lot of people from Wiltshire were still in the army.
It was also an oppoprtunity for me to see how British politicians work. He was not working as a pompous or a high-profile person. He got along with virtually everybody on the streets. The mayors of the little towns looked a bit pompoius, though. He drove a very simple car and always made sure that he got to the venue on time. It was a learning experience for me and will be useful especially if I indeed joined politics in my country. He keeps me encouraging to go back and involve in politics with the aim of providing fresh air to Nepalese politics. I think this is one of the things I am interested in future, though not certain at this stage.
I spent the evening at his house in a rural part quite far off from Chippenham. It was such a wilderness. He had 5 horses, 2 pigs (pets), some roosters and dogs. His wife was a hard-working country woman who loved going hunting, working with and riding horses and things. It was a pleassant experience for me as I felt as if I had been back to my village home in Gorkha.
The rest is fine. I am struggling on with my novel. I hope to pull hard this weekend as I am not going anywhere this weekend. It has already crossed 11000 words and I am desperate to get it over 50 k by the end of the month, as required. The other day I read out bits of it to a native British couple. They quite liked my exotic stories based on Nepalese hills. Their views encouraged me further to plough through.
Busy man....
Last weekend was an interesting adventure with a British MP (Conservative Party).
I was invited to a fund raising dinner for the party, in which I was able to meet some senior people including Lord Lawnside (descendant of one of the Prime Ministers and Vice-Roy to India), a senior person in the upper house. The dinner was actually in his massive property hosting a country club and a spa.
Driving around Wiltshire with the MP to attend various Sunday Rememberance events was another fun. Although the day was dark, dreary, cold and raining, the spirits of the people in various small and big towns were high. They had gathered in the churches and streets to remember those heros from their area who lost their lives fighting for the country in various strife and war in the past.
It was a solemn occassion for me as well because many Gurkhas have lost their lives fighting for the British government. Now slowly, they are granted better treatment, but many of those who survived the horrors of war were sent back to Nepal empty handed. The British public now recognised that this was a gross mistreatment of the heroes who fought with their blood and sweat for the British empire.
The events also included offering of wreath to the idols marked with the names of people who lost their lives. Sessions were held in the local churches as well. If you didn't mind the biblical jargons and "amens", churches acted really as a community centre for all, religious and atheists alike. The events also include parade by the scouts and security units in the area. The whole town was shut down during the parade.
I was happy that people were glad to receive me. I always have the impression that people from rural areas are more friendly and open that those from the mega-cities. However, everybody asked me if I was a Gurkha. Perhaps I discovered a stereotype against Nepalese people hidden among the British public. However, I didn't mind because they didn't mean to demean me or whatever. All of them expressed their profound respect for and solidarity with the brave Gurkhas. It was indeed a great thing to learn.
It was interesting to learn that lot of people from Wiltshire were still in the army.
It was also an oppoprtunity for me to see how British politicians work. He was not working as a pompous or a high-profile person. He got along with virtually everybody on the streets. The mayors of the little towns looked a bit pompoius, though. He drove a very simple car and always made sure that he got to the venue on time. It was a learning experience for me and will be useful especially if I indeed joined politics in my country. He keeps me encouraging to go back and involve in politics with the aim of providing fresh air to Nepalese politics. I think this is one of the things I am interested in future, though not certain at this stage.
I spent the evening at his house in a rural part quite far off from Chippenham. It was such a wilderness. He had 5 horses, 2 pigs (pets), some roosters and dogs. His wife was a hard-working country woman who loved going hunting, working with and riding horses and things. It was a pleassant experience for me as I felt as if I had been back to my village home in Gorkha.
The rest is fine. I am struggling on with my novel. I hope to pull hard this weekend as I am not going anywhere this weekend. It has already crossed 11000 words and I am desperate to get it over 50 k by the end of the month, as required. The other day I read out bits of it to a native British couple. They quite liked my exotic stories based on Nepalese hills. Their views encouraged me further to plough through.
Busy man....
Monday 3 November 2008
Novel writing month
I have ventured on a new mission:
As per the tradition of the Failed Novelists, I enlisted myself for the novel-writing-marathon this November. The rules of the game dictate that I should have a minimum of 50k-word novel completed by the end of the month. And the suggested way forward is to finish a daily installment of around 1600 words.
Initially I was hesitant, but I did get on with it. I did start writing and the big plot is pretty clear in my mind. I intend to reflect on the lives of ordinary Nepalese people in the war-torn hills of Nepal. A war that is still largely unheard of to the world community, thanks to the biased western media. My story will also have elements of discrimination against the low caste, of course, but the main focus will be the difficulty of having to live with violence.
I believe ordinary lives in fact reveal extraordinary facts. Some of the incidents will be based on real stories from around my village, although the characters will be named differently.
I am conscious of one thing though - marketing in the west. The western readers do not find it interesting unless there is some connection to their lives and societies. I am pondering over how I could make such references or linkages between the Nepalese hills and Britain. Gurkha could be a possible linkage, but weaving it naturally will not be easy.
The other thing that worries me the most is that I may not be able to express as well as I do in Nepali. I have indeed published a few Nepali stories and some editors have appreciated it. It is certainly different to command a second language, but I hope that the publishers will polish it, if they see some scope with it.
As the organisers of the marathon claim, I need not worry now whether I will produce a marvellous piece like The Devil Wears Prada or a complete rubbish. Even if I indeed presented the latter, I will have learnt the lessons and will get an experience of writing. If it comes out to be an okay-product, I will be asked to revise in December. Or I could choose to revisit the piece after a few years, once my English has got better at Oxford. Anyway, I have taken the challenge and it is indeed a thrilling experience. The protagonists have already begun to speak to me about how they wish to be presented.
However, I should admit, I could not take the story forward that much today. I am short of nearly 900 words today. I hope I will recover on Tuesday.
Something to warm up for the fast approaching winter chills.
Novice writer
As per the tradition of the Failed Novelists, I enlisted myself for the novel-writing-marathon this November. The rules of the game dictate that I should have a minimum of 50k-word novel completed by the end of the month. And the suggested way forward is to finish a daily installment of around 1600 words.
Initially I was hesitant, but I did get on with it. I did start writing and the big plot is pretty clear in my mind. I intend to reflect on the lives of ordinary Nepalese people in the war-torn hills of Nepal. A war that is still largely unheard of to the world community, thanks to the biased western media. My story will also have elements of discrimination against the low caste, of course, but the main focus will be the difficulty of having to live with violence.
I believe ordinary lives in fact reveal extraordinary facts. Some of the incidents will be based on real stories from around my village, although the characters will be named differently.
I am conscious of one thing though - marketing in the west. The western readers do not find it interesting unless there is some connection to their lives and societies. I am pondering over how I could make such references or linkages between the Nepalese hills and Britain. Gurkha could be a possible linkage, but weaving it naturally will not be easy.
The other thing that worries me the most is that I may not be able to express as well as I do in Nepali. I have indeed published a few Nepali stories and some editors have appreciated it. It is certainly different to command a second language, but I hope that the publishers will polish it, if they see some scope with it.
As the organisers of the marathon claim, I need not worry now whether I will produce a marvellous piece like The Devil Wears Prada or a complete rubbish. Even if I indeed presented the latter, I will have learnt the lessons and will get an experience of writing. If it comes out to be an okay-product, I will be asked to revise in December. Or I could choose to revisit the piece after a few years, once my English has got better at Oxford. Anyway, I have taken the challenge and it is indeed a thrilling experience. The protagonists have already begun to speak to me about how they wish to be presented.
However, I should admit, I could not take the story forward that much today. I am short of nearly 900 words today. I hope I will recover on Tuesday.
Something to warm up for the fast approaching winter chills.
Novice writer
Monday 27 October 2008
My Deepawali
This weekend was so special that I felt at home in the UK for the first time...
I was invited to a Dashain-Tihar celebration organised by the Srinjshil Nepali Samaj in Aldershot. The annual event featured Nepalese cultural programmes, food, drinks and a short formal session involving some speeches. And of course, the event gave emphasis on the informal gathering of the Nepalese people, which was indeed useful and most enjoyable of all.
This Dashain, Nepalese equivalent of the X-Mas in the US and UK, was the worst in my life because I was alone in Oxford busy with series of induction programmes. My wife and son were in Kathmandu and my parents were in Gorkha. I am sure everybody in my family missed me and did not enjoy this Dashain very much. It was particularly hopeless for me because I did not have an opportunity to celebrate the day with anybody from Nepal.
In such a sad situation, I was blessed with an invitation to attend this event. And I really enjoyed the whole event. No word would suffice my gratefulness to the organisers.
It took me nearly an hour (or more) to get to the place by train from Oxford. On arrival, I felt as if I had actually gone back to my country. One would almost always bump into Nepalese people on the streets. I knew it was one of the Nepalese hubs in the UK as a result of having a Gurkha establishment there for a long time, but I did not know that so many Nepalese live in the area! Thousands of Nepalese, mostly Gurkhas, live in Aldershot and nearby Farnborough areas.
The President of the organisation, Sher Bahadur Sunar, himself a former Gurkha, was somewhat different from many other Gurkhas. He was well aware of the political developments in Nepal and was in fact involved in politics. He was close to the Nepali Congress party, and had high level contacts in the party leadership, as evidenced by visiting Sher Bahadur Deuba (former PM of Nepal) visiting his house recently. Sunar is enterprenual as well. He runs a restaurant which features lok dohori, particularly over the weekends. I thought he is doing an emulative work of promoting Nepalese culture in the UK.
When he launched his organisation in 2007, many had advised him to label it as a "Dalit" organisation. Many had also suggested him to limit the association to his own caste group - Bishwakarma. But he rejected both ideas and named it Srinjalshil Nepali Samaj (a creative Nepalese society). I rather prefer this alternative not least because "srinjalshil" is potentially a better replacement for the term "Dalit". It evokes a more forward-looking and positive image of the so-called low caste. Needless to state, our tradition is one of creativity, without which societies in the past would not run. We are a bunch of people with craftsmanship in our blood. This is still the case with most low caste in the rural parts of the country, although the feudal social systems have deliberately projected our traditional occupation as profane.
And his effort to include people from across the caste groups is something to be learnt by everyboday. One of the reasons for the failure of so-called Dalit movements is our inability to rise above the caste, partisan and familial interests. We still have not learnt to get united; divided as we are, our case is bound to remain feeble and uninfluential.
The cultural programme was also quite good. It was good to know that the young kids who have been here for a while had not forgotten their culture and tradition. We must indeed make sure that the cultural package from our society/civilisation comes with us and stays with us for many generations. Our culture defines who we are and where we come from. If we lose our culture, we fear losing our identity.
It was also an opportunity to see for myself how the Gurkhas had settled in the UK. This is a relatively recent development. British Gurkhas are considered fairly well off in our society in Nepal. It was clear that many of them wish to go back at a certain point, possibly when their children would be able to look after themselves. They badly miss their good life back home. They were frustrated that they had to work hard once again, even after retirment, to make a living in this costly land. Specially, the spouses had an unusually hard time compared to their much-privelaged life in Kathmandu or Pokhara or Dharan. Lahureni has become an icon for the extravagant women in Nepal.
It was however, sad to learn that the Nepalese people settled in the UK still have not given up their stereotype against the people of so-called low caste. They explicitly or implicitly show their casteist behaviour, an extreme form or undeclared racism. The UK is a country where you can not discriminate against people on the basis of their race or coolour or origin. But the Nepalese people's habits die hard. This is an issue that deserves serious attention. I am sure the UK Government would be willing to look into it if the residents made complaints formally in an organised manner. I am not sure what the situation is in other European countries and across the Atlantic.
Anyway, this was such a great time for me to be able to see so many Nepalese people from my own community. Much of my homesickness appears to have gone after the event.
It was quite late at night when the programme ended. I was taken by one kind Gurkha to his house and looked after well. Sunar also joined me the next morning. I returned after a nice dal- bhat meal.
Thank you Sunar-jee! Thank you Srijanshil Samaj! Thank you all friends for the wonderful time! After all, I had never imagined that I would be celebrating this Deepawali in the UK!
Happy Mood.
I was invited to a Dashain-Tihar celebration organised by the Srinjshil Nepali Samaj in Aldershot. The annual event featured Nepalese cultural programmes, food, drinks and a short formal session involving some speeches. And of course, the event gave emphasis on the informal gathering of the Nepalese people, which was indeed useful and most enjoyable of all.
This Dashain, Nepalese equivalent of the X-Mas in the US and UK, was the worst in my life because I was alone in Oxford busy with series of induction programmes. My wife and son were in Kathmandu and my parents were in Gorkha. I am sure everybody in my family missed me and did not enjoy this Dashain very much. It was particularly hopeless for me because I did not have an opportunity to celebrate the day with anybody from Nepal.
In such a sad situation, I was blessed with an invitation to attend this event. And I really enjoyed the whole event. No word would suffice my gratefulness to the organisers.
It took me nearly an hour (or more) to get to the place by train from Oxford. On arrival, I felt as if I had actually gone back to my country. One would almost always bump into Nepalese people on the streets. I knew it was one of the Nepalese hubs in the UK as a result of having a Gurkha establishment there for a long time, but I did not know that so many Nepalese live in the area! Thousands of Nepalese, mostly Gurkhas, live in Aldershot and nearby Farnborough areas.
The President of the organisation, Sher Bahadur Sunar, himself a former Gurkha, was somewhat different from many other Gurkhas. He was well aware of the political developments in Nepal and was in fact involved in politics. He was close to the Nepali Congress party, and had high level contacts in the party leadership, as evidenced by visiting Sher Bahadur Deuba (former PM of Nepal) visiting his house recently. Sunar is enterprenual as well. He runs a restaurant which features lok dohori, particularly over the weekends. I thought he is doing an emulative work of promoting Nepalese culture in the UK.
When he launched his organisation in 2007, many had advised him to label it as a "Dalit" organisation. Many had also suggested him to limit the association to his own caste group - Bishwakarma. But he rejected both ideas and named it Srinjalshil Nepali Samaj (a creative Nepalese society). I rather prefer this alternative not least because "srinjalshil" is potentially a better replacement for the term "Dalit". It evokes a more forward-looking and positive image of the so-called low caste. Needless to state, our tradition is one of creativity, without which societies in the past would not run. We are a bunch of people with craftsmanship in our blood. This is still the case with most low caste in the rural parts of the country, although the feudal social systems have deliberately projected our traditional occupation as profane.
And his effort to include people from across the caste groups is something to be learnt by everyboday. One of the reasons for the failure of so-called Dalit movements is our inability to rise above the caste, partisan and familial interests. We still have not learnt to get united; divided as we are, our case is bound to remain feeble and uninfluential.
The cultural programme was also quite good. It was good to know that the young kids who have been here for a while had not forgotten their culture and tradition. We must indeed make sure that the cultural package from our society/civilisation comes with us and stays with us for many generations. Our culture defines who we are and where we come from. If we lose our culture, we fear losing our identity.
It was also an opportunity to see for myself how the Gurkhas had settled in the UK. This is a relatively recent development. British Gurkhas are considered fairly well off in our society in Nepal. It was clear that many of them wish to go back at a certain point, possibly when their children would be able to look after themselves. They badly miss their good life back home. They were frustrated that they had to work hard once again, even after retirment, to make a living in this costly land. Specially, the spouses had an unusually hard time compared to their much-privelaged life in Kathmandu or Pokhara or Dharan. Lahureni has become an icon for the extravagant women in Nepal.
It was however, sad to learn that the Nepalese people settled in the UK still have not given up their stereotype against the people of so-called low caste. They explicitly or implicitly show their casteist behaviour, an extreme form or undeclared racism. The UK is a country where you can not discriminate against people on the basis of their race or coolour or origin. But the Nepalese people's habits die hard. This is an issue that deserves serious attention. I am sure the UK Government would be willing to look into it if the residents made complaints formally in an organised manner. I am not sure what the situation is in other European countries and across the Atlantic.
Anyway, this was such a great time for me to be able to see so many Nepalese people from my own community. Much of my homesickness appears to have gone after the event.
It was quite late at night when the programme ended. I was taken by one kind Gurkha to his house and looked after well. Sunar also joined me the next morning. I returned after a nice dal- bhat meal.
Thank you Sunar-jee! Thank you Srijanshil Samaj! Thank you all friends for the wonderful time! After all, I had never imagined that I would be celebrating this Deepawali in the UK!
Happy Mood.
Wednesday 22 October 2008
A thought from the day
I was at a weekly coffee hosted by my department (ISCA) when this occured...
I met a fellow student who is also studying MPhil in Social Anthropology and is contemplating researching on the Sahara area of Afria. One of the main reasons was that she knew the place quite well and had the interests to research on these people - refugees and non-refugees on a multi-sited fieldwork.
She gave me a suggestion on my possible future research, which I took as a bright idea. She advised me to aim for doing side projects as an anthropologist in future and review the studies conducted on Nepal (such as those on Newars of Kathmandu by Dr David Gellner and on the untouchables of Bajhang district by Dr Cameron). This would be a new practice in anthropology, a native anthropologist critiqueing the study on his native societies.
I think I should not let the idea die out, specially if I am going to work long-term as a practioner. So far I believe I will indeed be working as one.
In the discussion, there was a mulling over whether I should research on Nepal itself or outside. The concept had to be analysed looking at its pros and cons. If I did indeed go for fieldwork in a Nepali-speaking community in Nepal, I would not need to learn the language and I would be familiar with many things. As a result, my DPhil could be swift - perhaps completed within two years after MPhil.
On the flipside, I will be deprived of the excitements and challenges involved with the unpacking of a completely new culture, in other parts of the world except South Asia. I would need to start from zero and everything I learnt would look exciting and new. It will certainly not be the case with my research in Nepal.
I will need to think about this very carefully and fairly quickly as well. My adviser's opinion will also count, of course.
I met a fellow student who is also studying MPhil in Social Anthropology and is contemplating researching on the Sahara area of Afria. One of the main reasons was that she knew the place quite well and had the interests to research on these people - refugees and non-refugees on a multi-sited fieldwork.
She gave me a suggestion on my possible future research, which I took as a bright idea. She advised me to aim for doing side projects as an anthropologist in future and review the studies conducted on Nepal (such as those on Newars of Kathmandu by Dr David Gellner and on the untouchables of Bajhang district by Dr Cameron). This would be a new practice in anthropology, a native anthropologist critiqueing the study on his native societies.
I think I should not let the idea die out, specially if I am going to work long-term as a practioner. So far I believe I will indeed be working as one.
In the discussion, there was a mulling over whether I should research on Nepal itself or outside. The concept had to be analysed looking at its pros and cons. If I did indeed go for fieldwork in a Nepali-speaking community in Nepal, I would not need to learn the language and I would be familiar with many things. As a result, my DPhil could be swift - perhaps completed within two years after MPhil.
On the flipside, I will be deprived of the excitements and challenges involved with the unpacking of a completely new culture, in other parts of the world except South Asia. I would need to start from zero and everything I learnt would look exciting and new. It will certainly not be the case with my research in Nepal.
I will need to think about this very carefully and fairly quickly as well. My adviser's opinion will also count, of course.
Tuesday 21 October 2008
Daddy Missed Badly
Today my wife called me from Kathmandu, Subash was with her. We spoke for nearly half an hour.
It's been a month since I left them. By now my wife and I are becoming accustomed to living separately. It was really difficult at the start. My wife kept crying for sometime. Although I did not cry, I was extremely sad and felt very lonely indeed. It was bad also because the university orientation or the study had not begun and I did not have friends here. So, I kept remembering them in my room, I lived with their memory.
However, my son Subash was perhaps not comprehending at that stage that he was not going to see me for a while. Perhaps he had hoped that the UK was one of those districts in Nepal and I would come back after a few days - just like my frequent district visits from work. We had tried to explain this to him before my departure, but perhaps he had not got the point. Therefore, he did not make much fuss initially. But Rita has been informing me lately that he has begun to miss me badly.
He keeps remembering me every evening, she said. And he particularly misses me on Fridays. He tells his mom and friends that I would go and pick him up from his school on Fridays, like in the past. Friday being my half-day at work, I used to take him home from school almost every Friday. Frequently we used to go to Thamel for pizza or chips before going back home.
I hope this will not have any impact upon his tender psyche. She said he sometimes tells everyone of his plans to meet daddy in the UK after some months. He told his grandparents and others in his maternal uncle's house that he would not be there to celebrate the next Dashain. That was all very good. But what is this thing about Friday?
When we speak over the phone, he invariably complains about his mom not being kind to him. He keeps telling me how she had smacked him or had not bought him what he had wanted, and so on. He once said, "Daddy, come and smack mom, she is always smacks me". I know his mom is not so unkind, but I think he is making a pretext for asking me to come over quickly.
Well, what to do? This is really sad. It would not be that bad if I were one of those fathers (some in Nepal) who try to keep themselves distant from their children. I used to spend the weekends with him. He would never leave me alone when I was at home, but would never sleep with me at night. We used to go for a walk or visit places and relatives. He would want to somehow keep his mom off during the day.
What to do? It was never our intention to be separated for long. We had never stayed separate for this long. But the circumstances at times force us to take the harsh decisions. We are looking forward to our reunion once I have found a family accomodation outside the college, a school for Subash and a job for my wife.
Sad Daddy
It's been a month since I left them. By now my wife and I are becoming accustomed to living separately. It was really difficult at the start. My wife kept crying for sometime. Although I did not cry, I was extremely sad and felt very lonely indeed. It was bad also because the university orientation or the study had not begun and I did not have friends here. So, I kept remembering them in my room, I lived with their memory.
However, my son Subash was perhaps not comprehending at that stage that he was not going to see me for a while. Perhaps he had hoped that the UK was one of those districts in Nepal and I would come back after a few days - just like my frequent district visits from work. We had tried to explain this to him before my departure, but perhaps he had not got the point. Therefore, he did not make much fuss initially. But Rita has been informing me lately that he has begun to miss me badly.
He keeps remembering me every evening, she said. And he particularly misses me on Fridays. He tells his mom and friends that I would go and pick him up from his school on Fridays, like in the past. Friday being my half-day at work, I used to take him home from school almost every Friday. Frequently we used to go to Thamel for pizza or chips before going back home.
I hope this will not have any impact upon his tender psyche. She said he sometimes tells everyone of his plans to meet daddy in the UK after some months. He told his grandparents and others in his maternal uncle's house that he would not be there to celebrate the next Dashain. That was all very good. But what is this thing about Friday?
When we speak over the phone, he invariably complains about his mom not being kind to him. He keeps telling me how she had smacked him or had not bought him what he had wanted, and so on. He once said, "Daddy, come and smack mom, she is always smacks me". I know his mom is not so unkind, but I think he is making a pretext for asking me to come over quickly.
Well, what to do? This is really sad. It would not be that bad if I were one of those fathers (some in Nepal) who try to keep themselves distant from their children. I used to spend the weekends with him. He would never leave me alone when I was at home, but would never sleep with me at night. We used to go for a walk or visit places and relatives. He would want to somehow keep his mom off during the day.
What to do? It was never our intention to be separated for long. We had never stayed separate for this long. But the circumstances at times force us to take the harsh decisions. We are looking forward to our reunion once I have found a family accomodation outside the college, a school for Subash and a job for my wife.
Sad Daddy
Saturday 18 October 2008
An exciting beginning
Another special day...
Today was a special Saturday in my life. It was the day of University Matriculation. It sounded quite exciting and indeed took nearly half of the day getting properly dressed up and getting the photos taken at the college. Then we marched en masse to the university examinations schools, graduates and undergraduates mixed up and everybody clad in special university gown called Sub-Fusc and dark suit with white bow tie. I am sure I must have looked funny. The tourists were eyeing at the hordes of gown-clad students moving from all directions, some moving to get matriculated and others returning in long ant-queues. I am sure the Oxford tourists must be really excited by what they saw today. A rare sight indeed!
The actual event lasted no more than ten minutes. Someone repesenting the vice-chanellor read out a few lines in Latin - in keeping with the hundreds of years of Oxford tradition. Of course, I did not understand Latin ( I even do not understand Sanskrit, forget about Latin or Greek) and therefore did not get the exact message. But it was later summarised in English, which was essentially an oath-taking for hard work and striving towards excellence. And then somebody else from the university read out the stuff about the matriculation tradition and how the university expects the students to learn from a rich diversity of talents from around the world. Very true, indeed! My college alone has 33 natinalities this year!
We were released in queues soon after the brief ceremony was over. Each student was carrying a hat but nobody put it on. The hats can climb on the heads only after we pass our final exams i.e. on the graduation ceremony. The hat carried a symbol of responsibility to work hard and pass the exams. Very interesting tradition indeed!
When I returned to my room, I became a litte sentimental and nostalgic. I remembered my illiterate and very poor parents who are still living in our village home in Gorkha hills of Nepal. I saluted their resolve to get me educated. If they had insisted on me working in the fields like most other kids in the village, surely I would not have come this far. Also, I thanked all the teachers in my life whose collective contribution made me who I am today. And I wholeheartedly thanked St Hugh's College and the University which offered me the funding, without which my dream of studying here would remain merely a dream.
On a slightly different subject, I have changed the heading of my blog as of today. There is a little story behind the change. As I started the blog under the heading, I am not Untouchable, the blogging company suspected it of being a potential spam blog. It threatened to get rid of it within 30 days if I did not express my desire to retain it. I did go back to them and mentioned my intention to retain it. Probably they checked the contents and allowed it to run again following a blockage for some days.
At first I was annoyed, but I soon realised the potential reasons. In fact the blog-incident opened my eyes to a new reality. In fact my heading was meaningful to me and south asians but not to the large chunk of British public and the Western world. In our culture humans are categorised into the "touchabe" and "untouchable" groups based on what level of caste hierarchy belonged to. And I was trying to resist the stereotype on me as a low caste or an "untouchable". But clearly, the westerners would not understand it straight away. Here the terms like "touchable" or "untouchable" tend to refer more to the bodily contacts for sex or love or son on. Perhaps this must be the reason why the company machines smelled something dodgy in my blog. Fair enough! Taking it positively, it was another opportunity to learn to adapt to the new socio-cultural environment. A perfect lesson to the future anthropologist!
I hope that the changed heading of my blog will help attract some readership in future. I would be most grateful for any comment or feedback from the interested people. I can live with the fierce criticisms as well, provided they intend to help me improve.
This much for today. I am now a bonafide member of the Oxford Unicersity, not just officially but also ritually. In other words, Oxford has baptised me today and taken me into its caring hands. Many great men and women have studied here. I may not become one of them, but I am sure many of the faces I see in the university will come out as great leaders or popular personalities in different fields in future. Who knows, I might have shared a chat or coffee with one of the Nobel Prize winners of the future!
Mitra Pariyar
Oxford University
Today was a special Saturday in my life. It was the day of University Matriculation. It sounded quite exciting and indeed took nearly half of the day getting properly dressed up and getting the photos taken at the college. Then we marched en masse to the university examinations schools, graduates and undergraduates mixed up and everybody clad in special university gown called Sub-Fusc and dark suit with white bow tie. I am sure I must have looked funny. The tourists were eyeing at the hordes of gown-clad students moving from all directions, some moving to get matriculated and others returning in long ant-queues. I am sure the Oxford tourists must be really excited by what they saw today. A rare sight indeed!
The actual event lasted no more than ten minutes. Someone repesenting the vice-chanellor read out a few lines in Latin - in keeping with the hundreds of years of Oxford tradition. Of course, I did not understand Latin ( I even do not understand Sanskrit, forget about Latin or Greek) and therefore did not get the exact message. But it was later summarised in English, which was essentially an oath-taking for hard work and striving towards excellence. And then somebody else from the university read out the stuff about the matriculation tradition and how the university expects the students to learn from a rich diversity of talents from around the world. Very true, indeed! My college alone has 33 natinalities this year!
We were released in queues soon after the brief ceremony was over. Each student was carrying a hat but nobody put it on. The hats can climb on the heads only after we pass our final exams i.e. on the graduation ceremony. The hat carried a symbol of responsibility to work hard and pass the exams. Very interesting tradition indeed!
When I returned to my room, I became a litte sentimental and nostalgic. I remembered my illiterate and very poor parents who are still living in our village home in Gorkha hills of Nepal. I saluted their resolve to get me educated. If they had insisted on me working in the fields like most other kids in the village, surely I would not have come this far. Also, I thanked all the teachers in my life whose collective contribution made me who I am today. And I wholeheartedly thanked St Hugh's College and the University which offered me the funding, without which my dream of studying here would remain merely a dream.
On a slightly different subject, I have changed the heading of my blog as of today. There is a little story behind the change. As I started the blog under the heading, I am not Untouchable, the blogging company suspected it of being a potential spam blog. It threatened to get rid of it within 30 days if I did not express my desire to retain it. I did go back to them and mentioned my intention to retain it. Probably they checked the contents and allowed it to run again following a blockage for some days.
At first I was annoyed, but I soon realised the potential reasons. In fact the blog-incident opened my eyes to a new reality. In fact my heading was meaningful to me and south asians but not to the large chunk of British public and the Western world. In our culture humans are categorised into the "touchabe" and "untouchable" groups based on what level of caste hierarchy belonged to. And I was trying to resist the stereotype on me as a low caste or an "untouchable". But clearly, the westerners would not understand it straight away. Here the terms like "touchable" or "untouchable" tend to refer more to the bodily contacts for sex or love or son on. Perhaps this must be the reason why the company machines smelled something dodgy in my blog. Fair enough! Taking it positively, it was another opportunity to learn to adapt to the new socio-cultural environment. A perfect lesson to the future anthropologist!
I hope that the changed heading of my blog will help attract some readership in future. I would be most grateful for any comment or feedback from the interested people. I can live with the fierce criticisms as well, provided they intend to help me improve.
This much for today. I am now a bonafide member of the Oxford Unicersity, not just officially but also ritually. In other words, Oxford has baptised me today and taken me into its caring hands. Many great men and women have studied here. I may not become one of them, but I am sure many of the faces I see in the university will come out as great leaders or popular personalities in different fields in future. Who knows, I might have shared a chat or coffee with one of the Nobel Prize winners of the future!
Mitra Pariyar
Oxford University
Sunday 12 October 2008
Oxford story
Hello again
Slowly I have overcome my boredom because the reading has now begun. Unlike in Nepal, we do not need to study in class 10 to 5 or whatever and we can choose to go to the lectures and seminars of our own choice. Self-judgement counts alot, as I found out, although the faculty advisor would always be ready to offer any help. Although I am a student of anthropology, I could choose to attend a lecture on completely different topics, such as the hard science. It would be extremely foolish if I did that, though.
Besides, I have joined a student club called the Failed Novelists. This is essentially a club for those interested in poetry, drama, essay, novel or any kind of literary work. There were more students than the organisers had anticipated and so the group had to be split into two. A lady from the US was so good at poetry, she read out her fairly long and excellent poem out of her head! We also had a theology student from America who has apparently finished writing a novel based on spirituality and some thrillers (the latter bit, he said, deliberately added for commercial reasons). He said that he actually visited parts of India that are mentioned in his novel, mainly Agra, Varanasi and some other places. Although some authors can describe a place out of reading from travel books or whatever, but it will not be the same as the first hand experience of the place. He said that he was now working with the editors and publishers in the US and he hopes to bring it out within a couple of years.
Isn't that amazing? When will I be able to state a similar story? When will have a manuscript at hand and start negotiating with the editors of the top publishing houses?
A number of students read out their sonnets and poems. My God, they knew alot about the current trends of the literature in the US and Europe and they cited many contemporary and great authors and poets of the past. I felt, in a way, slightly awkard. And while presenting my piece Homesick, I warned them that I was relatively novice in the area and came here mainly to learn. I hope to carry on with my passion for reading and writing stories and novels and hope to publish books through world-reknowned publishing houses. I am not a student of English literature or language but it will be my hobby and I will pursue it as far as possible. And this platform proves to be very useful, at least from the experience of the first gathering at Teddy Hall College.
Perhaps this much for now. I have just completed reading a award-winning novel The Inheritance of Loss by Kiran Desai (Indian-American author) and I have embarked on another popular book which has been already presented as a leading movie - The Devil Wears Prada. The former mainly dealt with the life in Kalimpong area of India in the last twentieth century and the latter deals with a high-profile life in the heart of America.
Slowly I have overcome my boredom because the reading has now begun. Unlike in Nepal, we do not need to study in class 10 to 5 or whatever and we can choose to go to the lectures and seminars of our own choice. Self-judgement counts alot, as I found out, although the faculty advisor would always be ready to offer any help. Although I am a student of anthropology, I could choose to attend a lecture on completely different topics, such as the hard science. It would be extremely foolish if I did that, though.
Besides, I have joined a student club called the Failed Novelists. This is essentially a club for those interested in poetry, drama, essay, novel or any kind of literary work. There were more students than the organisers had anticipated and so the group had to be split into two. A lady from the US was so good at poetry, she read out her fairly long and excellent poem out of her head! We also had a theology student from America who has apparently finished writing a novel based on spirituality and some thrillers (the latter bit, he said, deliberately added for commercial reasons). He said that he actually visited parts of India that are mentioned in his novel, mainly Agra, Varanasi and some other places. Although some authors can describe a place out of reading from travel books or whatever, but it will not be the same as the first hand experience of the place. He said that he was now working with the editors and publishers in the US and he hopes to bring it out within a couple of years.
Isn't that amazing? When will I be able to state a similar story? When will have a manuscript at hand and start negotiating with the editors of the top publishing houses?
A number of students read out their sonnets and poems. My God, they knew alot about the current trends of the literature in the US and Europe and they cited many contemporary and great authors and poets of the past. I felt, in a way, slightly awkard. And while presenting my piece Homesick, I warned them that I was relatively novice in the area and came here mainly to learn. I hope to carry on with my passion for reading and writing stories and novels and hope to publish books through world-reknowned publishing houses. I am not a student of English literature or language but it will be my hobby and I will pursue it as far as possible. And this platform proves to be very useful, at least from the experience of the first gathering at Teddy Hall College.
Perhaps this much for now. I have just completed reading a award-winning novel The Inheritance of Loss by Kiran Desai (Indian-American author) and I have embarked on another popular book which has been already presented as a leading movie - The Devil Wears Prada. The former mainly dealt with the life in Kalimpong area of India in the last twentieth century and the latter deals with a high-profile life in the heart of America.
Friday 3 October 2008
Hello from Oxford
Hi
I am a new student at Oxford University. I am told that I am the first Nepalese Dalit to study at Oxford.
I am here for two years doing my MPhil in Social Anthropology, starting October 2008. I also hope to go for DPhil, depending on my qualification and the availability of funds.
Unlike most other Oxford students, I come from one of the poorest families in one of the poorest parts of the world - Nepal. According to the university figures, only 4 Nepalese students studied here last year. Something similar should be the number this year.
I recognise that there are a multitude of challenges in front of me. Not only am I new to the British education system, but also to the subject. That will require some real hard work to get cracking on - and I am poised for the mission.
One of the good things is that I have the experience of working with the Brits (as Press Officer at British Embassy, Kathmandu, 2001 - 2008) and I almost fully get their accents (including the Scots).
I have a clear goal - to contribute to the Dalit movements in India and Nepal. Even if I did not join politics, I hope to advocate for their rights through my academic and literary works. It is true that the voice of the millions of Dalits are still muted.
One of my obvious ammunitions will be, hopefully, my books and articles. I am passionate about reading and writing, specially prose work. I am a columnist with an English weekly in Kathmandu (concerned if I will be able to contribute in the heights of my coursework!).
I am very interested to meet up, build contacts or share ideas with those who know something about the plights of the low caste in the Hindu societies and share my passion. Besides, I would love to get connected to the established and new fiction writers, particularly those who base their stories on less privelaged peoples of Africa, Asia or other parts of the globe.
I have started reading my first book at Oxford, Anita Desai's Inheritance of Loss. The award winner has intrigued me from the beginning, also because it deals with Nepalese-Indians in Kalimpong and Darjeeling areas of India.
Please pass on your feedback and comments.
I am a new student at Oxford University. I am told that I am the first Nepalese Dalit to study at Oxford.
I am here for two years doing my MPhil in Social Anthropology, starting October 2008. I also hope to go for DPhil, depending on my qualification and the availability of funds.
Unlike most other Oxford students, I come from one of the poorest families in one of the poorest parts of the world - Nepal. According to the university figures, only 4 Nepalese students studied here last year. Something similar should be the number this year.
I recognise that there are a multitude of challenges in front of me. Not only am I new to the British education system, but also to the subject. That will require some real hard work to get cracking on - and I am poised for the mission.
One of the good things is that I have the experience of working with the Brits (as Press Officer at British Embassy, Kathmandu, 2001 - 2008) and I almost fully get their accents (including the Scots).
I have a clear goal - to contribute to the Dalit movements in India and Nepal. Even if I did not join politics, I hope to advocate for their rights through my academic and literary works. It is true that the voice of the millions of Dalits are still muted.
One of my obvious ammunitions will be, hopefully, my books and articles. I am passionate about reading and writing, specially prose work. I am a columnist with an English weekly in Kathmandu (concerned if I will be able to contribute in the heights of my coursework!).
I am very interested to meet up, build contacts or share ideas with those who know something about the plights of the low caste in the Hindu societies and share my passion. Besides, I would love to get connected to the established and new fiction writers, particularly those who base their stories on less privelaged peoples of Africa, Asia or other parts of the globe.
I have started reading my first book at Oxford, Anita Desai's Inheritance of Loss. The award winner has intrigued me from the beginning, also because it deals with Nepalese-Indians in Kalimpong and Darjeeling areas of India.
Please pass on your feedback and comments.
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